The call comes early in the morning this time. ‘‘I’ve got something that will solve the climate change problem,’’ an excited voice says.

I prop myself up in bed. I’m tired and haven’t embraced coffee, let alone natural light, and my clock says its is 7.36 AM.

‘‘I am prepared to give you this as a world exclusive,’’ the voice says.
‘‘How did you get my number,’’ I shoot back. But feeling bad, I ask what the miracle solution is.

It is a plan to turn carbon emissions from coal fired electricity into feed-stock for cows. I have heard about it before, it is not new, and I tell him that. He confesses as much - but the project needs investors and a story in the paper would help he says. I ask him to send me an email.

It’s not the first solution I have been offered. In fact it is the eighth this month. Some are more mainstream - wave power, biochar. Others are a little extreme - artificial trees, ocean seeding etc.

Last week, an older man named Adolf rings my office number. He again is offering a solution to the climate change problem. Extremely busy eating a sandwich, I ask him to send me some information in the mail.

It arrives a few days later. It turns out to be the most incredibly detailed plan to establish a series of hydro electricity plants in Papua New Guinea. The electricity generated would then be transmitted to northern Australia across the Torres Straight to power ore smelters. The hydro-electricity would mean Australia could close down coal, oil and gas power plants in Queensland.

The accompanying note says the German born Adolf (I promise I’m not kidding) came to Australia in the 1950s and helped construct the Snowy Hydro scheme. He later worked as an electrical mechanic on other hydro schemes including in PNG.

His package contains a number of maps. It also contains a proposal for what seems to be a television documentary - I’m not sure he understands that I am a print journalist.

Adolf writes that his plan would not only make Australia the world leader on climate change, ‘‘but would also become the richest country in the world’’.

I now have the maps on my fridge at home - they date back to 1989. Adolf called me on Tuesday to ask for them back and I am having trouble giving them up. Maybe Adolf is on to something, maybe he isn’t - how would I know?

On Wednesday a letter arrives in the mail. A man named Sean has written to tell me he has technology which will solve climate change. I am startled when the top of his letter states he will pay me $200,000 to investigate the story (here it is, time to pay up Sean!).

As I flick through the document I find that Sean’s ‘‘operation’’ will not only solve climate change, it will end over-fishing, end deforestation, create a new financial system for newspapers, develop a new democratic system, offer a ‘‘voice operated house’’ for under $1000, produce first generation (I’m not sure what it means either) of pure space vessels. To top it off, this vast array of utopian delights is outlined in a non-religious bible - otherwise known as a book.

Quickly, I log onto to his website to read the 89-page document of ‘‘proof’’ for a few minutes before deciding I have gone totally mad.

I tell the press secretary for Greens Senator Christine Milne, a thin good humoured fellow name Tim, about the ‘‘operation’’.

‘‘I have a guy who calls me every two days about perpetual motion, shouting down the phone - ‘why aren’t you guys on to this’,’’ Tim says laughing.

On the lawns of Parliament house there has been a small tent where a man is fasting for climate change. I heard him on the radio early last week. He was described by the host as a 29-year old Melbourne University student. ‘‘29-year old student!’’ I proclaimed in my head at the time, following the thought up with something conservative about getting a job.

The faster’s marketing person has been hassling me about a story for two weeks. I am amazed that even fasters have media representation.

I have decided to ignore the whole thing - if I am not writing a story about solving climate change with PNG hydro then not eating food to solve climate change ain’t going to cut it.

But there is no escape. My housemate has a friend staying at my place who has come to Canberra to ‘‘show solidarity’’ with the faster. He is angry the media is not properly covering the science of climate change.

‘‘What you need to understand...’’ he says, setting off on to an indescribable rant as I open a beer which promises to be 100 per cent carbon offset.

Later as I come to work, I see the faster's tent being packed up and the rumours are they have given up.

My colleague laughs when I tell him this and asks whether I saw them eating veal for lunch. A group running for climate change is also in town. They want to meet. We do - and they tell me that climate change has big ramifications for security and the amount of water in the Murray.

The firefighters union drive a vintage fire truck around Parliament House to highlight the increased likelihood of bushfires because of climate change.

‘‘There would be more of us here,’’ the national secretary of the union say after the press conference, ‘‘but there is an extreme fire danger warning today and most of our members are on.’’

‘‘And its November, we’ve never had an extreme day this early!’’

In my inbox there are hundreds of e-mails about climate change. Scientist say climate change will kill the Great Barrier Reef. A world wide study shows carbon emissions continue to rise globally. A reader says her suburb - Altona in Melbourne’s west - will be submerged if there are sea levels above a metre and wants more information.

Sitting at my desk now I sort through everything - the PNG hydro, the space ships, the fasts, the scientific reports, the firefighters. Some are brilliant, some interesting, some insane. Most are welcome. But today these litany of ideas and information bring me no inspiration.

Because somewhere, sometime, somebody is saying something about an emissions trading scheme, Liberal infighting and a Senate vote...